What Does Eating Almost a Pound of Dried Apricots in One Hour Spell?

D-I-S-A-S-T-E-R

or maybe

G-A-S

or even better

C-R-I-P-P-L-I-N-G N-A-U-S-E-A


One thing that I have discovered with this pregnancy is that as long as I am not hungry, I am able to keep my nausea under control. Another thing that I have learned is that foods that I normally would crave (McDonald's fries, greasy Mexican food, sweets) now make me sicker than sick and as long as I stick with dense foods that are bland and filling, I am good to go. Today, as I choked down some saltines smothered with chunky peanut butter at work, I decided to make a dietary change and give fruits and veggies a try, so I headed down the street to the Fresh Market to grab something healthy for lunch.

I headed straight for the dried fruit section, where I picked up a tub of dried apricots and a tub of cinnamon-coated dried apples. I also grabbed some pita chips, organic fruit roll-ups, lime seltzer water, along with a cup of turkey chili and a Caesar salad for lunch. Good stuff, methinks.

Well methinks wrong. The turkey chili made me gag at the first sniff, and the dressing on the Caesar salad had an overpowering egg smell, also making me gag. I glanced at the rest of my purchases and zeroed in on the dried apricots. Dense? Check. Relatively bland? Check. Filling? Check. I dove into the tub of apricots, and for the first time today, I felt human again.

I brought the tub of 'cots with me into a client conference call I was participating in this afternoon with my boss and her boss. At first, the other two ladies in the room chuckled at my huge vat of apricots and marveled at the fact that I had eaten at least half of them, but when I explained that they were working with my stomach and that I was feeling good, they gave me the, "Yeah, you're so totally pregnant" shrug and moved on.

Then, halfway through the call, I must have started to turn green because my boss's boss grabbed the apricots away from me and hid them behind her laptop where I couldn't see them anymore. I spent the rest of the day doubled over, alternating between painful gas pains and agonizing bouts of nausea. I even left work a little early so I could head home for some couch time. As of right now, hours later, I am still suffering.

I am thirteen weeks pregnant today. I thought this nastiness was supposed to be waning by now.