Honky Tonk What?

I don’t understand the song “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk”. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Trace Adkins, but for some reason this song just confuses me.

First off, what is a badonkadonk? Judging from the lyrics in the song, I’m guessing he’s referring to a woman’s backside, but do we really know for sure? When I think of the word badonkadonk, I think of an old beater car rumbling over hills and losing its hub caps.

There’s also a rather disturbing line in the song that says, “And ooo wee, shut my mouth, slap your grandma.” What!?!? Slap my grandma??!?! What a horrible thought! And you expect me to listen to the rest of the song? I adore my grandma, and I’m pretty sure that if I slapped her, she’d chase after me and beat me with her cane.

Then, there’s this line: “Lord have mercy, how’d she even get them britches on?” Ok, I’m assuming that this song is an expression of how sexy a woman looks in tight jeans. It’s anything but sexy when I have to struggle to get my pants on—quite the opposite, actually. If I have to stand in the mirror and wonder to myself how I managed to get my britches on, I’m certainly not wearing them out dancing. Maybe it’s just me...

Still, despite this song’s obvious pitfalls, I find myself dancing in my seat and singing along...I’m sick.